Why Sex Changes After Kids

sex-after-marriageBefore we had kids, things were certainly a lot easier. It’s not that we would change our lives for the world, but we must admit that activities like having sex was something we could do whenever we pleased. To be a parent means you have to get creative at times, especially so that the little ones are none the wiser. It can prove to be a difficult task, especially when you factor in exhaustion, lack of interest, or even self-confidence issues. If you could catapult yourself back to a time when you felt your sexiest, without messy babies and toddlers destroying your clothes, or when you actually cared more about the way you presented yourself things would certainly be different.

No matter who you are at one time or another we’ve all succumbed to the guilty pleasure of “yoga pants Mom.” And why not? So what if we’re not hitting the gym? The elastic waistband feels good and with the way it folds down it’s flattering on just about any shape. I’ve been there, in the trenches of that “this is what I look like now” feeling and it’s a hard rut to pull yourself out of. Then there is the lack of sleep with caring for an infant, or the sheer exhaustion from chasing a toddler around all day. Or if you are that mom shuttling your kids to and fro, that is beyond tiring. Oh, and let’s not forget that thing called work that can have you flat on your ass the second you hit a pillow.

While some of us women may be a bit more interested in sex than others, after you throw kids in the mix things are simply not the same. I heard on the radio once a woman bragging about all the sex she was having, even with having 5 kids at home. Clearly the abundance of children may have come as a direct result of all the sex she and her husband were having, but honestly I don’t know how they even managed time to breathe. Sometimes after a long day (which happens more times than not) the last thing I feel like doing is anything intimate. A nice hot shower and some clean sheets sound like the winning ticket after a long day versus an orgasm. And why? Because it’s more realistic. Not all kids go off to bed like good little boys and girls at nightfall. And I don’t feel particularly attractive when I’m the equivalent of the walking dead.

My kids aren’t awake at all hours of the night by any means, but still the possibility of them interrupting has crossed my mind on several occasions. I wouldn’t want to provide my children with a mental picture to scar them for the rest of their lives! It’s interesting how you can make use of just a few minutes when you’re a parent, and even funnier to think that your sexual encounters with your spouse once lasted for hours on end. Getting creative isn’t so bad, because you may never think about your bedroom closet the same again! And really, it’s not like there’s any specific reason you have to wait till the end of the day to be close to your significant other.

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About This Blogger

Modi Palmer

Modi Palmer resides in Houston, Texas with her family. She loves to write, talk about all things mom/child, watch NFL football, and knows her way around the kitchen. She believes that life is short to be taken too seriously, and she tries to find humor in all situations. Her source of happiness stems from her family, and doing what she loves—writing.